I say it all the time: Kyu is not Risa. I never expected him to be her clone and, in all honesty, I didn’t want that again. I wasn’t looking for another fearful, dog-reactive dog with GI problems (well, two out of three ain’t bad). I didn’t want that challenge again. Kyu, however, presents entirely new challenges which I’m struggling to overcome.
Despite his differences, I’ve found I’ve made the same mistake in his training that I made in Risa’s so long ago. One would think I would have learned better. 😉 Much like his predecessor, Kyu lacks solid foundations in focus and engagement. Again, I have trained tricks and behaviors but not spent enough time on valuing me above distractions. I promised Kyu I’d give him a solid foundation and I failed!
Of course, it’s never too late. I didn’t realize how badly I’d erred in teaching Risa focus until she was mid-way through her career in rally. Granted, with her fears, she was never going to locked-on with laser-focus. But she started to react in ways I hadn’t expected when her focus was lost and I couldn’t tolerate it (for safety reasons). I enrolled in my first Fenzi Dog Sports class on focus and ramped up our training. It made a huge difference.
Since that course proved so successful for my Mutt-Mutt, I’m going through it again with Kyu on my own time. The only thing holding us back now is his lack of desire to train. A problem I never had to this extent with Risa.
There were times Risa would quit on me. When I got frustrated (something I definitely improved upon during our time together) or the environment was too much. Most of these things I wouldn’t have even recognized when I first started dog training. Even with them being on my radar these days, I sometimes still fail to notice them in time. I never realized how forgiving Risa was of my inadequacies until I really got into training Kyu. Risa was sensitive to my moods and feelings but was not as affected by them. She would also repeat exercises over and over without quitting (for the most part). She was able to connect dots much easier than Kyu which allowed me to be a sloppier trainer.
It was easy to see where Risa and I mirrored each other. I generally feel Kyu and I have little in common but he is hyper-sensitive to my moods. Even the smallest amount of frustration from me or overt pressure will cause him to quit. It turns out we are both empaths and are strongly affected by the emotions of those around us. Since I can’t teach him to put up a wall around himself to keep out the feelings of others (something I’ve learned to do to protect myself over the years), I have to be far more cautious of my mood when it comes to training. As you might expect, I am not always good at this. 😉
In addition to overt and inadvertent pressure, I have to contend with the knowledge that training in general was poisoned during his illness. He didn’t feel good and food certainly didn’t help. It’s highly likely he’s connected some training with icky feelings which I also have to overcome.
While I begin to work on ramping up our focus and engagement training, I am struggling to do so. I have the most time to train with him in the evenings but this is the time he is most stressed about training at all. If I get out cookies and look like I’m going to start a session, he gets nervous and will not take food or offer behaviors (cued or not). Location doesn’t seem to matter at all. Whether it’s the kitchen, living room, or training space; I get the same reaction. It’s really disheartening.
He certainly doesn’t hate training, though. He’ll happily do it when I sneak it in at other times or take it on the road. I’ve taken to doing quick sessions after his morning walk or right when I get home from work. I’ve also slipped in some focus work and engagement training on our walks themselves. This will soon become more challenging as the weather gets colder. I will have to make special trips to fun places to work on these skills! I’m happy I haven’t ruined training completely but it is a struggle to work on things sometimes.
I also am trying to make sure I’m careful to not pressure him to work with me because it’s SO FUN. He will back off completely if I come on too strong. I want him to choose to work with me. And it’s really hard some days to respect his “no.” I believe in giving dogs choice when possible and I respect his decision. But it still hurts me sometimes. My dog doesn’t want to do super fun stuff with me. 🙁
Despite our struggles, he is improving. He managed to score a 97 his second time in rally at his breed specialty with a LOVELY connected performance. He also earned his first title in musical freestyle (Entry MF) the following weekend. He’s also becoming better connected with me in agility. In fact, he’s exceeded expectations the last few times we’ve worked on his weave training in the yard. One day, he hit a really hard entry from the opposite side. Just this week, he blew past me to take the weaves while I was trying to set him up because I’ve built desire to go through the poles! It was hard to deliver his reward at that distance but I couldn’t complain. 🙂
I’ve definitely stepped back on much of his training to try and give him a break and repair the damage I’ve done (intentionally or not) to our training relationship. Our day-to-day relationship, thankfully, is very strong. It’s just in training where we struggle. While I’m not training with any specific goals in mind and am doing as little formal training as possible, my goal this winter is to work on his focus and engagement training. As I well know, all the well-trained tricks in the world mean nothing if your dog won’t look to you for direction. I’ve been there before.